Finding Me
by bitchcraftmadison
Summary: When Madison left Ipswich, she left a piece of herself behind. Now, only four years later, she returns to Ipswich to continue her new, sober lifestyle. A lot changes in four years. (Rating may change.)


The inside of the bar smelled like ash and it made her wish she brought her pack. She was at Nicky's for over an hour and no one save for Nicky himself had realized who she was. Madison thought that was a bonus to hiding under the hoodie she bought earlier at The Gap. On any other day, she wouldn't be caught dead in the baggy, cheap excuse for a piece of clothing; but today was not like other days. Madison was bored being locked up in her house with nothing to do and decided on visiting Nicky's before her first day of school. She was supposed to keep a low-profile, but then again Madison Montgomery never played by the rules. People would eventually find out when she turned up at Spencer. For now she just wanted to relax and have some fun.

Madison had just leaned over to ask Nicky for another coke when she felt the back of her skirt fly up and screeched, flinging both her hands down to her bum before glancing around to see if anyone had noticed. As she scanned the room, she saw a familiar face: a face she hoped to avoid for as long as she could. There, at the pool tables, was Pogue Parry and Reid Garwin. They used to be close before the young starlet took off to chase a life of fame and fashion. Madison quickly averted her eyes and was quickly lost to another time.

_"I'm going to be famous soon, I just know it." She squealed, feeling elated. "I'm already doing photo shoots, it's only a matter of time before someone puts me in a movie. Don't you think?"_

_"I don't know, maybe," Pogue shrugged, flipping his shaggy hair from his eyes. It had grown out over the summer again and he hated getting hair cuts. "I mean, you're only fourteen. I wouldn't count on it."_

_"Ugh, don't remind me," She pouted, sending a glare to her tiny chest. "I barely fit the shirt they had me wear in wardrobe."_

_"You know that's not what I meant."_

_"Yeah, I know."_

_Madison scrunched her nose and let him ramble on about the bike he got for his birthday and how he wanted to get a yellow one some day as they walked back to his house. She wanted to listen, but her mind was swimming with possibility. Fame; it meant that people would want to be her friend. They'd give her free things whenever she wanted and call her nice things just because she was in movies. It all seemed too good to be true. Every few miles Pogue would ask her things and she'd just nod yes or smile a little with her mind still set on her dreams. _

She was vaguely aware of Nicky's lips moving, though she heard no sound. She shook her head, deciding that it was time to wake up from that particular daydream.

"What?" She asked, blinking. "I'm sorry, my mind was somewhere else."

"I asked if you were in town for a movie." He said, looking oddly at her. "Seems like the kind of thing you'd come here for and I don't know why else the famous _Madison Montgomery_ would grace us with her presence."

"I'm just settling down for a while."

"You're _engaged_?"

"No, Nicky, I'm not getting married," Madison half-smiled. "I don't think I ever will. I just mean I'm trying to relax for now. It got to be a bit too much, you know?"

"No," He shrugged. "I can imagine, but I don't think I _know_. That's not an easy life, girl. I never could understand why you chose it."

Madison's mild mood deflated at that. He was right; it wasn't easy. It never had been. She worked hard to get where she was and it got her nowhere in the end. The starlet wasn't happy or even close to it; she was depressed. All her money, her Gucci, even her Caucasian Ovcharka dogs couldn't fill the void missing in Madison's life. She'd turned to drugs and sex and parties to feel that even for a second her life was alright. It had all failed of course, which was what led to Madison's being in Ipswich today. The judge in charge of her case agreed to let her off with a warning if she slowed down for a while. Her manager seemed to think that meant being shipped back to Ipswich. Whatever the reason, she was here now and Nicky had brought things up that Madison wasn't ready to talk about. Instead of getting emotional, Madison made an excuse about being late for curfew and parted ways with the bar owner.

She nearly made it to her car without being noticed. _Almost_. As the driver-side door came into view, someone shouted, "Hey!"

Madison's froze. She knew that voice. She'd know that voice anywhere and she would bet her entire net worth that he was on his way over to her. Regretfully, Madison turned around and planted a stage grin on her face. She wasn't in town for anything other than relaxation and she may as well be friendly so long as she's meant to stay here. His eyes made an appearance before the rest of him and she found herself wondering if they'd always been that blue or if it was the lighting in the parking lot.

"I thought you'd be leaving with Pogue?" She questioned, wondering why he was talking to her. They didn't exactly part on good terms. "I've gotta get home."

"Pogue's fine, I just wasn't sure if I actually saw you or not." He smiled, albeit crookedly. "I could drive you... if you want."

She opened her mouth to protest, but she couldn't think of a reason to say no. Instead of rejecting his request, Madison just nodded and threw him her keys, walking to the passenger side of her Porsche. It was brand new as in it had just arrived the previous day. She figured if she were moving back to Ipswich, she'd better get a new car. You could never be too careful in this town and Madison was anything but careful.


End file.
